Monday, May 4, 2009
Finding my roots
Sure. You can laugh at my picture. I suck at technical stuff and quite honestly don't know any other way to show you what I'm talking about in this here post without drudging up actual tooth pictures from the Internets. And, trust me, those actual tooth pictures can be downright disgusting.
So I drew a picture for you instead.
See the Normal Tooth? He's the Happy Tooth (that's why he's smiling!). He is normal because he has three roots like any normal molar has. Three. And they're straight. Three straight roots. Normal. Happy.
See the Freak Tooth? He's the Grumpy Tooth (that's why he's frowning!). He is grumpy because he has the normal three roots plus an extra root that magically fused with one of the other three roots and they had a baby root and somehow there's a straight, parallel root that runs along the top where the jawline meets the palate and...LET'S STOP AND DO A RECOUNT!! 3 + extra + baby + parallel = 6. Six. And they're not straight. They're HOOKED. Except for the parallel root that totally stumped the dentist who said he's "pretty sure" it won't cause a problem later on(because he can't get to it on the roof of my mouth - he's an endodontist, not a magician!).
Well, I'm "pretty sure" that root canal was the most painful, traumatic experience of my life. Three entire thingies (I don't know what they're called) of the numbing gun and then direct injections of lidocaine into each root as the drilling required. Drilling. Into roots! That weren't NUMB!!!!!!
And because my teeth are freaks of nature, I'm thinking of donating my body (at least my mouth) to the University of Florida's College of Dentistry when I die. Which I actually wished for more than once today.
Has anyone seen my Lortab???!!